Overheard at VCU is a Facebook page people at my college use to post stupid things they see and hear. However, no matter how outlandishly stupid the original post is, it is the people who comment on those posts that say the dumbest things. I’ve been watching the page for a while and decided to finally troll them. Here is the tread, and I hope you will appreciate my first documented troll secession. Also, I’m still waiting for people to help me hit Cats Against Capitalism and Catarchy.

Original Post:
This is technically overheard/ seen… & a bit of a rant.
Last night around 1:45 AM, on Harrison street in front of the pollack building- 7 drunk frat guys randomly decided they wanted to fight & attacked 2 men carrying pizzas, and in the process shoved one of them into my car and left a very large dent.
I don’t know who you are or why you think you are entitled to be such an arrogant asshole for no reason, but I hope you feel really good about yourself today. I hate to group all fraternities into one ignorant boat, but when someone does shit like that to innocent bystanders for no reason, you’re doing it to yourself.
You don’t run shit & you’re lucky I didn’t call the cops on you.
(31 likes. Not quite what people look for when they come to the page, but why not tell over 5,000 about a crime you witnessed and did nothing about?)

1) Person #1: Do you know what frat they are in? You should call the cops now, report it, and have them pay battery and the damages to your car. I bet there was a nearby camera that could assure the identity of them.
(12 likes for wanting justice.)

2) Person #2: Girl! Are you ok??
(2 likes. I think she’s fine because she stayed in her car, but who knows maybe she has PTSD from this experience.)

3) Person #3: “I don’t have any friends so I need to get drunk with other guys.” – people in frats
(2 likes for generalized quote. That’s not how quotations work because no one would say such contradictory nonsense.)

4) Person #1: Not all frats are bad Person #3. Some are academic oriented and service oriented which really help build character, friendships, and experience.
(3 likes for defending frats.)

5) Person #4: Nah all frats suck
(2 likes)

6) Person #5: Uh.
You should have called the cops… And you’re not too late.
Honestly, you’re not doing ANYONE a favor by ranting about it. Might as well have kept it to yourself.
But. I’m glad you’re okay though. Good story brah.
(4 likes, can “but” be a sentence all on its own? Conjunction Junction, what’s your function?)

7) Person #6: why would you not call the cops on people committing an assault
(10 likes for reporting a violent crime.)

Now, Person #7 is my obnoxious nemesis for this thread.
Liberal Vader
This is his profile picture, so I’m going to refer to him as Liberal Vader.

8) Liberal Vader: The frat boys who try to act tough around that city would probably shit themselves and call for mommy if they ever got put in Richmond lockup. But you know, whiteness
(5 likes for implying white privilege.)

9) Person #8: Yeah, I don’t understand posting it here and not calling the police, especially if they did damage to your property. People get away with so much crap because of this same scenario.
(2 likes for pointing out the bystander effect.)

10) Me: Hahaha this is the best post so far this semester.
(Gotta love the drama.)

11) Me: No justice, no peace… get over it.
(And so it begins.)

12) Person #9: Still report it, otherwise your insurance will increase due to property damage, plus vcu doesn’t need that kinda grown bullies
(4 likes for justice.)

13) Liberal Vader: ^nihilism and apathy wow what a breath of fresh air. Funny that’s what I like to call my fists
(1 like for implying violence in my direction.)

14) Me: Really? What else are the police in a gun-free zone?
(1 like for calling the police armed bullies.)

15) Liberal Vader: Your privelaged little protection from reality?
(1 like for a sentence that is grammatically incorrect. I thought I knew what he meant, but if I’m wrong then I seriously need to study up on my leftist linguistic skills.)

16) Me: Yeah, in a gun-free zone. I’m surprised stuff like that doesn’t happen more.
(2 likes for pointing out that gun-free zones increase violent crime.)

17) Liberal Vader: You keep using this word “gun-free” I don’t think it means what you think it means @Tyler Lloyd
(0 likes, well Vader you just made yourself a target for me to troll.)

18) Person #6: grabs popcorn, pulls up chair
(11 likes, oh look I have an audience.)

19) Me: ** You’re privileged little protection from reality. (3 grammar mistakes there) Actually, you create your own reality, so don’t take pride in that mantra of hopeless victimization. I don’t think you know much of what anything means, good luck on finals.
(I corrected his grammatically incorrect sentence. Then challenged his beliefs, but he will only focus on the former.)

20) Person #10: So let me get this straight. You saw fratools attack 2 men,didn’t bother calling the cops for a felony assault in progress, and are only worried about the dent in your car? You watched and did nothing, you’re just as guilty…
(9 likes opposing bystander apathy.)

21) Liberal Vader: I have no idea what I’m talking about. LOOK A GRAMMAR MISTAKE. Please dude you think igaf?
(I do think you “I give a fuck,” so I blocked you on my Facebook to stop interacting with you. The mistake I made later was unblocking Vader to see what he was saying.)

22) Person #11: l o l
(1 like)

23) Liberal Vader: Delete your bonehead comments. Good move @tyler hopf
(I didn’t, I just blocked Vader at comment #19 because I knew he would keep fucking with me. Also, Hopf is someone I found on Wikipedia. I wonder if Vader looked him up just to insult me with the reference. It could mean something else, but whatever.)

24) Person #10: You might as well have just taken your phone out to record te rant in a video while it was happening
(1 like for filming a personal rant about a crime right when it is happening in front of you.)

25) Original Poster: I’m not going to apologize for posting on this page. the police have been contacted, and the idiots who decided to act like douche bags in front of an academic building that has several cameras will be caught. I don’t really need to explain myself but since you’re so concerned, my phone was dead last night & I just noticed the dent this morning. I posted hoping that the victims would maybe see it & be more inclined to report it themselves as well & not let those assholes get away with it.
(6 likes for explanation and wishful thinking.)

26) Liberal Vader: On second look professor hopf I found that my grammar is just fine. Nice try though
(0 likes, no one cares, I still have him blocked, and we’ll revisit that later.)

27) Me: Hahaha, that’s so great!!
(Laughing at wishful thinking.)

28) Liberal Vader: Frat boy bitches turning themselves in? Good luck with that
(1 like, hey look we agreed on something.)

29) Person #2: Or you know, you guys could not be jerks.
(2 likes to stop trolling.)

30) Original Poster: No not the attackers, the people who were attacked
(1 like, because you assume the victims didn’t already report it?)

31) Me: Did you just blame the victims? Sorry, I’m done trolling. Try to make it harder in the future.
(If I didn’t backpedal here I would have caught a lot of shit for contradicting liberal logic.)

32) Liberal Vader: ^gotcha sorry that dude got me on a trolling warpath.
(0 likes, no one cares what he has to say here. Also, I just unblocked him around this comment because the thread was slowing down.)

33) Liberal Vader: Try to be a man and don’t delete your comments to cover up your stupidity next time. Btw it would be your not you’re professor.
(Wrong again, now he understands that he was blocked, and starts right back up where I left him.)

34) Me: Explain it
(I might have made a mistake in acknowledging him again.)

35) Person #12: How do you know those guys were in frats?
(0 likes, good question, but won’t get answered.)

36) Liberal Vader: You are (contraction) privileged protection vs your (possessive) privileged protection. How’d you get into college again?
(2 likes, forgot the word “little” he used in original comment which made the sentence ambiguous, but now I see that he was being condescending. I should have just assumed that from the context of most libtard Facebook commenters.)

37) Me: Ok man, I’m done if you’re done.
(I get it, he’s an asshole and I’m ready to move on.)

38) Liberal Vader: That’s the thing dude I’m never done. BYE BYE!
(His aggression just affirms how successful I was in trolling him.)

39) Me: You’re never done? **Your privelaged little protection from reality?
(0 likes, but I feel like this comment has some profound literary value open to anyone’s interpretation.)

40) Liberal Vader: Yes by all means keep copying and pasting my comments. It doesn’t keep me full of delicious tolls or make you look like a complete bonehead, like, at all
(**tools to make you look)

41) Person #13: “Stab first, don’t ask questions”- (then tags unrelated person)
(Liberal Vader is the only one who gives a like for this initiation of violence.)

42) Person #10: I like turtles.
(4 other people also like turtles.)

43) Person #14: You were like
12283_839980652687554_3739491412417825861_n
(Who is “you,” the original poster?)

44) Person #15: fucking chads
(Chads is a reference to frat guys.)

Later Original Poster comments:
I tried really hard not to group all frats together in this… I have friends who are in fraternities, and they’re great. Just some guys choose to embrace the stereotype… and those are the guys that make the rest look bad. Police recovered footage & hopefully this crap gets sorted out.
I don’t care about my car. It’s not like a freakin BMW- i drive a hyundai. Lol I literally was just hoping that one of the guys that got attacked would see this & report it too… and anyone else who witnessed the assault.
(Once again reaffirming her place in the bystander effect, while offering little more to go on other than a vague description and an emotional response.)

So that wraps up this thread for now, but I’m sure plenty of other people will have stuff to comment on there in the future. I think the police and VCU staff try to stay out of these kinds of posts because of how hostile and pointless they can be. Therefore, it really is just a place for libtard students to bitch each other out over dumb shit. I was surprised by how mad I made Liberal Vader, but I see where he is coming from now. If I didn’t take the time to document this thread then I would have kept my original misunderstanding of his stupid facebook comment, but now I understand it so much better. Now I understand what Liberal Vader meant when he said, “Your privelaged little protection from reality?” Even if he was acting sarcastic by marginalizing the police in this rhetorical question, he still misspelled privileged, which is thrown around like the N-word where I go to school. However, I don’t think of the campus police force as my “little protection from reality.” In fact, like I said earlier, I would rather create my own reality for protecting myself. Yet, it didn’t really matter what I would have said to Liberal Vader, because he would have continued insisting that I needed the police to protect me from him and others with that perspective of reality. I thank him though, because my correction to his condescension created a nice philosophic phrase.

– You are privileged little protection from reality.

Regardless of what I think of reality, or what Vader thinks reality actually is, how protected are we from it?

shawn quinlan  bystander effect full for Ross

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